Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Aspirations

Like a dammed-up stream, a life without change, motivation, or purpose is going to stagnate. 

What do you want to pursue in the near future?  Personal fitness goal?  Learning a new language?  Finding a new job? 

Life if FULL of exciting possibilities, and many times we don't even think to tap into 5% of them!  Imagine what life would hold for you with broadened horizons.  It'd be twice as exciting simply getting to enjoy your current interests/hobbies, much less finding new ones!

Reflect on life as a 5 year-old.  What was your fantasy career choice, back in the day? 

I wanted to be a horse ranch owner.
I wanted to be a graceful, strong ballerina, driven by passion and determination.
I wanted to be a teacher, revered by my students and empowered by my love for teaching young minds.
I wanted to be an artist, creating beautiful masterpieces with my imagination.
I wanted to be a singer and songwriter (I would make up songs in my car seat on long car rides and sing them for my parents).

Take any aspiration you've had since you were young.  Don't give up on it.  Life is full of surprises--if you want to do something, make it happen.  Empower yourself to become exactly what you've always dreamed of being & doing.

Ride a horse.  Heck!  Take riding lessons!
Go to that walk-in dance class for beginners every Friday night and learn to dance, even if it's not ballet.

Aspirations are supposed to make living life more exciting.  They're supposed to energize you and inspire you.  You're not supposed to rip yourself apart for failing to achieve them. 

So get out there and enjoy the incredible adventures life holds!

Quotes...

Not just because it's the cool thing to do, but also because they intrigued me-- I started about a year ago listing quotes on my Facebook page that I thought were striking.

I'm posting them here to give you a glimpse at the lovely layers of who I am, but also to maybe cause you to stop and retrospect about who YOU are, what strikes you as funny/ironic/quaint/delicious/or memorable?

When we think on things that make us who we are they not only solidify us as a person but make us more well-rounded as well.

In my very religious days I carried notecards of Bible verses that I was memorizing and meditating on.  I could list a few here as well, but the purpose of this post isn't to be spiritual, really, just cause us to think about ourselves re: our personalities and to take time to  think back.

Anyways!  Here are my quotes.

Comment below with your's!

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."

"Smarter people have dirtier minds."

"We must be the change we wish to see." --Ghandi
...
"PURRRRLL?!!" --the Bundle, by way of Becca ♥

"Mmmkay, Pumpkin?" --Hitch, when he beats up an a$$hole :-)

"What DO you call a female mallard? A femallard? A fallard?" --Michael (bahahaha)

"Be present." --Kevin Cosner

"There's no such thing as love. It's fantasy." --Zooey Deschanel, 500 Days of Summer

"You'll find out when you reach the top you're on the bottom." --Bob Dylan

"Only love could leave such a scar." --U2

"Sisters of MERCY!!" --my sisters, as we drive down Mansfield Avenue

"You know what happens when you assume, don't you? You make an ass out of u and me." --Sarah Berry Watson (do you get it?)

"It smells like giant cow butt around here..." --Tia Germain, commenting on the local VT smells (lol!!)

"The reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself." --Rita Mae Brown

"How can you NOT like a donut?!!" --roommate Josh (lol!)

"I know heart and head begin with the same letter, but you have to read all the way to the end." --HOUSE

"Dull people live in immaculate houses." --unknown

"And as we look at the future/ tho it be thru a tear/ keep an eye on summer/ this year..." --the Beach Boys

"Joy leaves the competition behind." --unknown

"Have a PBS mind in an MTV world." --bumper sticker saying

"Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see." --John W. Whitehead

The God of the sparrow and the leviathon defined beauty, who am I to wrap it in garlands and lace? --Annie Koelle (random fb friend)

‎"Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." -Eleanor Roosevelt

‎"I wanna touch you in real time, not find you on youtube. I wanna walk with you thru the mountains, not find you on facebook." --unknown

"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." --Ben Franklin

"I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer." --Jim Carrey

"The only thing that can make this day better is ice cream." --Michael Scott, The Office

"Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and an adventure." --unknown

"I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger..." --Talledega Nights

"It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good." --Anchorman (bahaha)

"If I were a lion, and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and EAT you! ...and then bang your tuna girlfriend!" --The Other Guys

"Tigers LOVE pepper. They hate cinnamon." --The Hangover

"wasn't there in the beginning/but when the story ends/gonna last with you longer than your friends" --U2 Cedars of Lebanon
See More

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Got the blues? Cheer up--life is shitty!

I had an epiphany on the treadmill at the gym tonight.

(I am a very analytical person.  Tonight I was analyzing my personal emotional/psychological tendencies.  Aren't I a nerd?)

Here is my epiphany:  "Life is equally full of the GOOD and the BAD.  You can choose to dwell on all the BAD stuff in life, or you can choose to dwell on all the GOOD stuff.  But if you end up living a miserable life, it's no one's fault but your own, because 1.) no one else lives in a magically perfect world, okay?  and 2.) you should really give up the ideal of what life "should" be like."

There 'tis.

(I'll break it down... Basically, I'm a very idealistic/romantic kind of person, and all my life I have wished for things to be a certain way.  I'll share.  When I was very little I drooled over American Girl catalogues and really wanted one of the $100 dolls to the point that I daydreamed that my principal stood up with me in front of the school and said, "If anyone has an extra American Girl doll, they should give it to this poor little girl who's parents can't afford one."  Too funny!  Or to the same extent when I was a little older and lonely after moving, daydreaming that another similar authority ordered kids my age to be my friends.  Lol.) 

(Life isn't perfect, nor will it ever be.  Get it out of your head that things will get better.  It's a mixed bag.  Sure, life will be wonderful sometimes and just as equally shitty, other times.  Whoever the genius was who said something to the effect that "the difference between adventure and dilemma is your outlook on it" had something there!)

(So slap yourself when you start pouting over ___________ stupid petty thing and cheer up, because life is shitty.  Big surprise!  haha.)

Winter Blues

After remaining in a state of denial the past few days (hmm, since the time change this past weekend, perhaps?) I have officially admitted to myself that I have the winter blues. 

It's dark when I get up and dark when I eat dinner.  It's gray all day.  It's cold and wet and nasty out.  And there's not much to do until it snows officially.  No sunny warm days to go biking.  No cold clear days to go skiing or sledding. 

I've put my mind to finding fun activities to look forward to during the dark days of winter, and here's what I've come up with!
  • swim classes with my Mom
  • workouts at the gym
  • tanning
  • ice skating indoors
  • shopping at the mall
  • painting on my easel indoors
  • going downtown
  • Christmas shopping
  • sledding 
  • skiing
  • snowmobiling
  • parties with friends and family
  • cooking & baking (esp. apple pies and such for Thanksgiving!  mmm!)
  • reading
  • bowling
  • minigolf
  • special projects--sewing, collaging, scrapbooking, photo editing
How about you?  What special activities do you pull out of the closet in the winter months when you're cooped up indoors on dark afternoons?

Spread the joy!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Does Facebook Really Bring Us Closer? (or is it just me?)

After watching the new Facebook movie, "Social Network," about the creator of the site, Mark Zuckerberg, I ironically am feeling rather down-in-the-dumps today while using the ever-popular website at work (can you say, lots of free time?).

During college, I had lots of action on Facebook... I started my first account in 2007 when, if my rusty memory is correct, only college students had access to the site.  And it was a fun, addicting way to keep in touch over the summer with my friends. 

Now, however, I'm working alone mostly, and my college friends have graduated and we've all scattered to the far corners of the earth.  I bought into the horrid lie that Facebook alone would keep us all in touch, but no.  It takes a little more than daily status updates to keep friendships alive.  Was I really just totally stuck on myself to think my friendships would stay strong while I neglected my friends in far away places?  Yup, apparently so.  I'm finding that even my cousins who live 15 minutes away seem distant. 

Social networking is baffling to me.  I must be really horrible at making friends in real life, because I find myself relying on Facebook alone to keep in contact with people. 

For real. 

The only person I talk to on a regular basis outside of Facebooking is my boyfriend.  How awful is that?!

And I don't know if this is just something unique to me--because maybe I'm just horrible at being sociable.  I don't know.  But I feel more and more like I'm drifting away from people I know and love--and have over 600 friends on Facebook.

*sigh* 

Does anyone else find themselves feeling ironically distant from their uber-connected Facebook friends?

Saturday, October 30, 2010

My skin is like a map of where my heart has been... --Natasha Bedingfield

**before you read this post, please watch this short 5 minute video on photo-shopping/retouching & body issues**

 Natasha Bedingfield, an English pop singer and music writer, made a unique music video called "I Bruise Easily."  She walks the halls of a hotel wearing Japanese traditional make up and a wig, hair pieces, false eyelashes, and kimono over her everyday clothes.

In the video she starts taking off pieces and parts of her costume and then removing her make up slowly to finally reveal herself, all while singing, "Anyone who can touch you, can love you, can leave you..." and "I bruise easily, so be gentle."

Ironically, the tall, slender, blonde musician is actually more lovely without all the get-up on than with the 9 pounds of make up.  But this video got me thinking about us women and our addictions to makeup, manicures, sunless tanning, Brazilian waxing, Botox, etc, etc.

We are crazy!  Not to sound like a raging feminist, but seriously, even many gay men don't go through the rigors we women do.  Why are we so addicted to feeling beautiful and looking perfect?

Personally, I remember feeling ashamed and ugly in the junior high.  I had really huge dark eyebrows that probably could have used a severe plucking, but neither my mother nor I had the presence of mind to pull off such a feat.  So I got called "Caterpillar Eyebrows" by some of the boys in my class who I thought were my friends and even advised by my best friend's older sister that I really needed to pluck my eyebrows.

While cultures around the world differ drastically in ideas of what beauty is, I think our culture in the United States is a little off-balance.  We struggle with both obesity and body issues bordering on obsession with being thin--teenage girls and even grown women struggle with anorexia and bulimia, disorders that threaten with death and infertility.  We're slicing, dicing, and rearranging our bodies to have bigger boobs, smaller/perkier/tighter/or flatter butts, plumper lips, smoother skin, or sharper profiles.

Change is usually a good thing--there's nothing saying we couldn't take off a couple pounds, plug in the treadmill and hop on it, or take care of our skin.  But the drive to be considered beautiful and acceptable or even perfect is pushing some women to the extremes of either obesity because of emotional issues stemming from rejection over their unacceptably uglyness, per se, or to starving themselves with bulimia/anorexia in order to attain the unattainable.

Reading blogs, articles, and findings about how culture should be changed, men should have to wear pantyhose and make up and curlers and high heels--yeah, I would love to agree that men should have to do those outrageous things so they could appreciate what we go through.

But I think we women have no one to blame but ourselves for our hatred of our body, our skin, our teeth, our hair.

You say to an angry, rebellious toddler who just slapped his little sister because she poked him, "You are only responsible for yourself.  No matter what your sister does to you, you shouldn't slap her back."  But do we stop to think of the same little quaint line when another woman informs us (whether knowingly or unknowingly) that we've gained a little pudge?  That our skin is a little pimply?  That we could use a little Botox?

We've lost sight of the "turn-the-other-cheek" principle.  We feel entitled to hit, kick, ridicule, back-stab anyone who does anything slightly similar to us.  It's our right to have vengeance--on others and on ourselves.

He dumped me for a skinny chick, so I'll show him.  I'll show myself I'm worth something.  I'll stop eating and I'll start working out several hours a day.  I'll gag myself so I puke.  I'll get skinny even if it means harming my body, harming relationships with my friends and family, and consequentially taking away anything I might have dreamed of having in the future.

We don't stop to think, "Oh, he's just selfish and stuck-up.  Sure he hurt me, but it's not my fault he's shallow," when a man dumps us for someone else (for whatever reason).

We don't stop to tell ourselves, "I don't want to be with someone so shallow."
Instead, we buy into their shallow mindset and try to change ourselves at our own cost.  We kill ourselves in order to be thin, a.k.a. "acceptable" with no thought of bettering ourselves mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and ultimately physically.

We are simply selfish and proud.

We don't have to look at supermodels and think, "Ugh, I hate myself for being a size 14 and not a size 00."

Why not think, "Oh wow, she must have amazing genes."  Or, "Hmm...to be that insanely thin, she must starve herself."  Or, "She must work hard for that body--and that career!"

We are simply stupid when we hate ourselves.

Women, we are beautiful by nature.  We're all different and all unique in our own ways.  We are smart and savvy, strong and powerful.

Women generations older than us fought for equality in the workplace and in politics and won.   

Let's fight a similar fight and win--the fight to be smart enough to think through what advertising tells us we should look like, what the media is telling us is "in", what health and beauty trends are popular, and what fashion says we've got to look like.

Let's be smart enough to research, to work hard, to eat well, to be humble, to encourage each other, and to lift each other up instead of tearing each other down.

Let's fight to be beautiful, healthy women who aren't so stupid and shallow we start hating the natural way our bodies are in order to become something that isn't even real--that's been photo-shopped and airbrushed and tweaked by professionals selling us their designer clothing, perfume, and gadgets.

If you know someone who struggles with an eating disorder, struggles with dieting & exercising, struggles with self esteem because they aren't the ideal stick-thin beauty, encourage them to love themselves with health and well-being.

For example:  think of an athlete who trains her body with specific exercise & routines, feeds it certain foods, sleeps a certain number of hours, and keeps tabs on everything with a goal in mind.  She may be thin, strong, and beautiful, but she got to that place by caring for herself and her body.

But think of my friend Kim, we'll call her (not her real name).  She started eating 3 leaves of spinach, a tomato, and drinking gallons of apple juice downed with laxatives.  She would purge after eating, then hit the gym for hours at a time until she had bone-thin arms, an emaciated face, but was--hurray--a size 0.  She was thin, all right, but she was terribly unhealthy.  She pushed away tons of friends in her fight to be thin.  Caused intense strain on her family as they tried to reason with her and fight to take care of her and prove they loved her.  She can't have children now.  And who knows if any man will be able to learn to love her when she isn't loving herself.

Please, women.  Let's be savvy.  Let's be healthy.  Let's be loving.

Turn the other cheek the next time your pride slaps you across the face.  You pass that skinny girl and you start to hate your body.  You get that fat, nasty, unlovable feeling?  Turn the other cheek and let your pride slap you on the other side of your face too.  Simply think.  Admire her stamina for working out, admire her for being strong in the face of chocolate cake temptation and use that admiration for another woman's success to spur you on to do the same--as long as you're not starving yourself.

Please, women.  The puking, the binging, the hating, the pinching, the pain--it's not worth it.  Please love yourselves and love the women around you.

We're in this together.

Watch this video:  Dove Evolution

Personal Testimony to Goodwill's Amazing-ness: Halloween Costumes!

So, my boyfriend and I have decided that we are the greatest match made in heaven when it comes to Goodwill hunting (no pun intended).  We both found our Halloween costumes there, quite unintentionally, this past summer. 

Mine is a poofy 90's pastel floral prom dress with huge poofy sleeves, massive floral bow in the back, and enormous skirt poofing out from a nipped-in waistline (as far in as my waist would let it "nip," that is, lol).  I plan on combining the dress with another awesome Goodwill find, my pink sheer, frilly apron from the 50s, to become Little Bo Peep! :) 

My boyfriend's costume is a pale blue polyester leisure suit from the 70s.  He plans on being a sex offender for Halloween and alluring people at the party with free hard candy in his pockets.  Haha.  He has been growing his curly hair with plans of fluffing it into a 'fro for the night. :)  Should be pretty impressive.

We hope to post pictures of our get-ups soon. 

Fall Blog!

Picket fences are pretty much always photogenic...


I love the textures of bark contrasted with the lush fluttery fall leaves

A white church, blue sky, and orange fluffy tree. :)


The spindly arms on this tree remind me of something from Dr. Seuss!

A pleasant fall walk through crunchy leaves. 

Get a Job! Step #3: Selling Yourself (no, you're not a hooker)


You’re not going to need a tight, red spandex dress or hooker boots to sell yourself on the job market, but you will need loads of persistency, an almost anal attention to detail, and the determination to keep trying. 

Shiny Inside & Out
In today’s culture of shallow values based mostly on surface appearances, it’s easy to try to polish ourselves up to look all bright and shiny to potential employers when really we know we are pretty dingy workers.  Your work ethic on the job makes up the core of who you are as a job candidate.  Employers can look at your resume, talk to your past employers and even contact your personal references.  They will most likely look up your MySpace, Facebook, and Twitter for a glimpse at who you really are.  And most places also do a credit check and a criminal background check.  Your surface shine isn’t going to last if you have carried a shoddy record in the workplace.  Working hard at every position you hold will go far, so I would recommend starting now, even if you already have a bad history.  You’ve gotta start somewhere.

Dig Up the Details
In addition to being shiny from the inside out as a worker, you really need to work on the details when job hunting.  Pinpoint a job you want, then go for it.  Take an advertisement and pull out the key words and put them in your cover letter.  Organize your resume so traits and skills listed in the advertisement are blaring at the top.  Definitely do not exaggerate skills you don’t have at all or have very little if any of.  Say you did get the job—who’s the fool now?  Oh, you don’t know how to even run a copier?  Um, you’re fired!  Yeah.  Be truthful, even if it’s painful.  The little details do matter.

When sending a cover letter, go the extra mile to find out who exactly it is doing the hiring.  If you need to, call up the company and do some detective work.  Ask.  Email people.  Find out and then address that cover letter to him or her.  That little detail screams “attentive!  persistent!  professional!”  as opposed to a sloppy, “Dear Um, Whoever is Hiring.” 

Be Appropriate, but Reach Out
Get a sense of the company and then when emailing your resume, references, and cover letter, use the appropriate amount of casual lingo or uptight, preppy language.  Drop hints that you make great treats for the break room, or refer to yourself as some of the superlatives in their “now hiring” ad.  Above all, keep that email short, though, and merely let them know you’re interested, confident, and enthusiastic. 

Sh*t Happens:  Double Check!
Double-check everything.  Make sure you’re sending the right resume to the right business.  Make sure you haven’t misspelled your own freaking name.  It happens!  Make sure the email you sent saying “I’ve attached my resume” actually has the resume attached. 

Basically, think of this:  that person on the receiving end is getting gazillions of emails regarding this position, and you must make yourself stand out.  Ultimately, selling yourself comes down to the perfect package of neatness in presentation, accuracy in spelling and grammar, pin-pointed details in a resume, contact information, and appropriate enthusiasm.

Cheer for Yourself!  Shout Out How Good You Are.
As for putting yourself on a pedestal, obviously think before you speak.  But definitely, if you feel you are qualified and willing to perform the duties listed, shout it out!  Say, “I’m positive I’d be a great addition to your team!”  even if you’re just applying to become a cashier.  Say, “I am a cheerful, punctual, hard worker,” even if you’re just wanting to become a waitress.  Little details count.

So I think that sums it up:  be real and truthful, be appropriate, dig up the details, perfect your package of cover letter, resume, and email, double-check, and paint a positive picture of yourself to the person reading. 

Get a Job! Step #2: Places to Look

This blog post could also be called “networking.”   

“Networking” is a funny word.  The “net” part of it reminds me of a spider web.  You know when you’re walking through the woods and suddenly—Blaaarghh!!—you run into a nasty, stringy, sticky spider web?!!  Yuck!  And *shudder* you probably have a spider on you, now, too!  That’s what networking is a little bit like.  You throw your web of contacts & acquaintances far and wide (really, I mean, you pretty much put yourself out there as much as possible in order to build that web), hoping that eventually you’ll snag an employer in your sticky web of contacts and you, the scary little spider, will be crawling all over that new job!  Haha.

“Networking” also contains the word “working.”  Which is a reminder that job hunting is a lot of, yes, work.  To nail a job, you are not going to be sitting around eating bon-bons (unless of course you’re training to become a fat, flubby, sumo-wrestler).  You’ll find out how much work as you continue reading, but be mentally prepared to roll up your sleeves and do some kuh-razy things in the battle for a job, my friend.

Anyways.  Places to look.  Hmm.  How about…everywhere?!  I mean, look at the stores & businesses you pass every day on your way from point A to point B.  Signs in the windows?  Are they hiring?  Is that somewhere you’d like to work? 

Use your noggin.  Do you have passion and potential to do something out of the ordinary?  Start your own business, maybe?  Become an entrepreneur? 

Feel out your own passion…as you are going about every day life, stop for a second to reflect on what makes you love ___.  Why would you pursue a career or a job in ____ field?  Be constantly thinking about ways to network and come up with new things to do. 

But really, especially if you are currently unemployed, the best advice I have to give (that was given to me) is to simply GET A JOB—and fast.  No employer likes to scan a resume and see huge holes in the time line.  Work.  Work anywhere.  If you can’t work for pay, then volunteer.  Seriously, be a go-getter.  Employers will love it.

I started babysitting when I was 13, then worked in day care after school.  From there I worked a seasonal job at the age of 16 in a call center selling hams.  I took it up a notch and rose to the honorable position as cashier, then worked in college in the dining hall on campus, sometimes sloshing up the my elbows in raw, half-frozen chicken breasts at ungodly early morning hours.  I quit school and worked as a waitress, then started my own house cleaning business for a few months.  I found myself working customer service after that, and meanwhile I was still babysitting and nannying whenever I could.  None of these have been glamorous jobs, but they paid my way and I was thankful for them.

Some places I have looked for jobs are…
my local paper's classifieds
store windows 
church bulletins
community bulletin boards

Some people who are great to know…
  • talk to your high school of college administration office-- they may have openings on campus or may know of individuals in association with the school who are hiring
  • past employers or past coworkers in any venue
  • church members 
  • friends in any work place
  • presidents of large companies
  • billionaires
  • basically anyone who is employed
Opportunities are endless:  you could be volunteering at Salvation Army and meet your future employer dropping off donated goods.  You never know.  Be creative, be innovative, spread yourself out, and work hard.

Examples of networking:
Beth Loveless, owner of America's Pet Store and founder of Everything Imagination, lived in Williston, VT, and my mother was her house cleaner.  Beth heard  through my mom that I was a print journalism student taking a break from school and hired me temporarily as an office assistant to help her out.  I basically filed a bunch of old documents and papers for her until things were tidy.  And then she started a little children's company and asked me to continue working for her as a copy writer for her website.  I probably would never have met Andrew Parker-Renga, musician of the band APR, who worked for the same little children's company for Beth, if my mom hadn't worked for Beth.  Through Andrew, my musician cousin Jacob was able to wiggle into the music/entertainment circles in Burlington's restaurants and bars in order to promote himself as a musician.  You never know where networking will take you! :)

Get a Job! Step #1: Breaking up with your employer


Step one in finding a job should really be the part where you tactfully “break up” with your current job.  If you’re currently unemployed, though, you don’t need to worry about this step. 

Timing
One aspect to worry about when breaking up with your current employer is timing.  Actually, in the job hunt, timing is pretty much everything.  The basic fact that both you and your potential employer are both looking to resolve each others’ needs is timing, in of itself:  you need a place to work right now, and they need someone to work for them right now.  Timing. 

Anyway, when you’re breaking up with your current employer, you want to make sure you time it well.  Don’t go quitting your job before you are absolutely positive you’re 100% guaranteed the new job.  Meaning, until you are on the pay roll, don’t give your notice.

Tactful 2-weeks' Notice
Which brings me to my second point:  it’s really nice to give a 2-week notice before simply quitting cold turkey.  Think about it.  Your current employer will need to fill your position (in most cases), and by leaving them high and dry, you do yourself a disservice.  In the future, when that employer gets a call from someone looking to hire you, they’ll remember that cold turkey quitting maneuver you so selfishly pulled, and hopefully the person giving you a reference will be kind, but you never know.  So it’s always nice to do the kind thing and give a good, long, 2 weeks’ notice.  They might let you go sooner, anyway.  But as you know, you get more flies with sugar, so…yeah.  Be nice to any employer you work for.  It’s the smart thing to do. 

Take Away a Good Job Reference
For the purpose of setting your own mind at ease, it’s also nice to be assured of a good job reference from your current or soon-to-be ex-employer.  When you do have that conversation about your 2-week notice, somehow try to niggle out a good reference from them.  Maybe refer to the amazing job you did working for them and ask if it’s okay to use them as a reference in the future.  And if you’re not sure who to direct future employers to for a reference, this is the time to ask. 


That pretty much takes care of the matter of “breaking up” with your current employer:  simply time it right, be tactful & gracious, and take the opportunity to discuss future job references.

It's been a while!

Have no fear! I've taken a little break from posting, but I will be back full of fun blog posts! 

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Ah-CHOO!! ...it's that time of year again...

Fall & Winter bring a slew of nasal terrors and sinus-passage problems... whether allergies, the occasional cold, or that imp, the Flu, you want to be savvy throughout the sniffles.

Raw skin around your nose from blowing it 100 times a day?  


  • Dermatologist Audrey Kunin says, "when you're constantly rubbing such a sensitive area, you create tiny cuts, which let bacteria invade and make the skin red and peely.  After you blow your nose gently (snot rockets are not the goal here), dab Polysporin ointment on the edges of your nostrils.  Things should heal up in a few days."








Chapped lips despite constantly reapplying lip balm?
  • Francesca Fusco, MD, assistant clinical professor of dermatology at Mount Sinai School of Medicine says, "Do some CSI-worthy detective work and examine your formulas.  A waxy balm that comes in a stick is preventative; the wax acts as a barrier to keep moisture inside lips.  But when there isn't any moisture to retain and your lips start splitting, you need an ointment that can seep into the tears to heal them from the inside."









Other cold, flu, and allergy tips...
  • Wet a washcloth with warm water and lay it across your nose and mouth to relieve a dry, stuffed up nose as well as chapped lips.  Then use the washcloth to slough off the dead skin cells loosened on your lips as they become moisturized.
  • Plug in a humidifier at night to relieve dry air-induced stuffy noses, dry skin, and chapped lips.
  • Eating local honey helps relieve seasonal allergies, as local bees will have gathered pollen from local buds.
  • Licorice contains an anti-inflammatory will help relieve inflamed, chapped cheeks in the winter.  Not sure how much good it will do you to munch it, but you can purchase DDF Intensive Holistic Lightener, $22, and other licorice-infused health and beauty products as well.

Websites to Love

GoodGuide.com  assigns thousands of products an ecofriendly/healthy score of 0 to 10 based on factors like ingredients and packaging.

DailyMakeover.com  inspired by a celebrity's hairstyle?  upload your face to this site's makeover tool, click on the celebrity's picture, and see how the style suits you!

Aromatic Men=Hotties...Why?

Researchers at the Univeristy of Liverpool doused a group of men in cologne and video taped their actions in a controlled setting, then had women rate these aromatic men against a control group of less-lovely-smelling men.  Guess who rated hotter & more confident in the videos?  Yup, those scrumptious-scented men!

Read more about how you (and many more mammals than just humans) can "smell the love!" 

Advice Genie: Your First Car & Apartment

My life as an independent adult started with kind of a lurch.  I was living a somewhat peaceful life at home when I was suddenly compelled (that's a story for another day) to find my own humble abode, means of transportation, and the trappings to go with those two very important--and pricey!!--things.

Here's a chunk of advice for savvy chicks out there right now.  No matter if you are 13 or 31, you should be tucking away some money for the future.  Make it a savings account or a glass piggy bank, it doesn't matter.  Just simply tuck away 10% of every paycheck or designate random gifts or financial findings to that "rainy day" money.  It'll make a hell of a difference!

Personally, I have a little decorative purse sitting on my dresser that I put my babysitting money into (maybe $20 a week), and it adds up.  When my car needed to be inspected and needed new tires, the $200 I had saved went to cover that, with money left over.


Another chunk of advice on adult life set-up.  When shopping for your first place, don't go to big brand-name box stores for those knick knacks like spatulas, scotch tape, or even curtains.  I can think of at least 5 smaller, cheaper places to find those little things that add up to big dollars.  Want the scoop on where to shop?  Ideas lurk below:
Each regional area of the United States sports myriad varieties of resale stores that aren't name brand or huge chains.  For your first apartment you don't need the top-of-the-line thumbtacks, shower curtain rings, or toilet plungers.  All you need is one that will get the job done.

For instance, I shopped at my favorite places and supplied my closets, cupboards, and entire apartment with the following...
  • assorted (adorable and unique) glasses and mugs each for 50 cents (Goodwill)
  • pink cow-spotted broom and dust pan for $4 (Christmas Tree Shops)
  • bath mats for $2 (Christmas Tree Shops)
  • curtains for $7 a panel (compared to $14) (CTS)
  • discount canned, boxed, and dry goods at a liquidation market for mere pennies (jello boxes, canned veggies and baking supplies, spices, flour, cereals, bottled water and juices, makeup, toilet paper and paper towels, even light bulbs and cookie utensils--I even got a shiny metal over the toilet rack for my towels and washcloths for a mere $10 at this particular liquidation market)
  • sheets and blankets for $5 and $1 respectively (throw them in the wash on hot with color safe bleach and you're set)(Goodwill & Salvation Army)
  • toaster for $5 (Recycle North)
  • microwave for $14 (Goodwill)
I don't even know how much money I saved by shopping second-hand for my first apartment!

Now, had I been someone who was a chef or something glamorous, I wouldn't have been poking thru the $1 bins at Christmas Tree Shops looking for measuring spoons and flimsy whisks.  I would've got straight to Williams-Sonoma for the best of the best.  But my cheap-version wooden spoons and metal whisks get the job done for the few scant times I use them in my kitchen, and I only paid pennies for each.

Then there's car shopping.  *ugh*  I bought my car at a place here in VT called Paya's Auto Sales, and my 2004 Pontiac Grand Am (a big-ish, solid car with power windows, cruise control, cd player and air conditioning) cost me $5995.  It was financed through a local credit union, and it's a great car:  safe on the roads in winter time, good on mileage, and easy on my pocket book (with payments under $200 a month).

Of course, if you want to pay for a brand new car whose value is worth 25% less the second you drive it off the lot, go right ahead.  I firmly believe in being able to buy a used or even rebuilt car after checking it thoroughly and calculating wisely, then driving it and taking care of it for years.  But it's all about what's in the package deal for your pride...sometimes driving a used or rebuilt car (or one that isn't very fashionable or sporty, like a Pontiac) isn't "cool."

It's a vicious, delicious cycle, saving money.  Not only does saving money by being savvy and frugal make you look like a winner because you end up surrounding yourself with possessions you need with money left over, but also you feel even more satisfied knowing that you're spending wisely and one step ahead.  After all, the more you have to tuck away for emergencies, rainy days, unexpected illnesses or lay-offs, the better.

Worried about buying cheap crap?
1.)  It might not be THAT much cheaper than the name brand stuff.  Do some research about where it's manufactured.
2.) Does it matter?  If it breaks, heck, it was $1!  Go buy a new one.  Chances are your name-brand _____ will break just as easily but be less- easily replaced.  



**photos of my beautiful, cheap-chic apartment and loverly gray Pontiac to come!**

Photo Blog! Winter Time in Vermont (something to look forward to)

This is winter in Vermont: snowmobile trails blazed all over snowy hills

Sunshine on twinkly snow while you make snow angels


Church Street in downtown Burlington, VT, sports winking Christmas lights and beautiful window displays

...it usually snows...a lot...

But even on the coldest of days you can bundle up, trek out to the hills and pastures, and sled and snowmobile to your heart's content :)

Snow shoveling is a GREAT work out...

...especially when you have 6 feet of it to move off your cars and out from under your wheels!

We Vermonters get the job done. (thanks for posing, Mom!)

Dogs love snow.

A beautiful, old Vermont home looks quite scenic amidst the drifts.

It's hard work climbing back up the hill after sledding.

Emily the dog fetching a stick...

Monday, October 11, 2010

RANT!! Goodwill is amaaazing!

This is my Goodwill rant & rave of the weekend.  I just have to let you know how amazing Goodwill is (and I will post pictures ASAP).

I found 6 shirts at Goodwill this weekend, a pair of flip flogs, and a Land's End DOWN parka with a furry hood.  All for $35.  

Hahaha!  **maniacal laughter**

I promise to post pictures soon.  

But in the meantime, I BEG you--please click the linked "Goodwill" up above.  Go find a Goodwill near you, and dig through those racks with purpose, because believe me, you will be filling up carts of amazing good deals.

What makes you feel alive?



What makes you feel 100% undeniably alive and tingingly go-get-'em superhuman??

The other night, my boyfriend and I were roaming the streets of Burlington with my younger sister, and we randomly decided to hop the fence of a local elementary school (where both of my grandparents went to elementary school in the 1900's, btw) for the express purpose of swinging on the swings.  


Needless to say, at 10 o'clock at night on a starry, crisp, clear October evening, soaring thru the black, silky air with your toes pointed at the stars felt AMAZING.

What have you done lately that's made you glad to be alive?

Love the Skin You're In!

Here's the down-low on cellulite. 

1.)  Guess what.  EVERYONE'S got it.  Yup, everyone:  skinny chicks, men, celebrities.  It's not just us fatties who love ice cream. 

 2.)  Cellulite ain't budgin'!  No matter what you try:  creams, rubs, massages, liposuction--nothing is proven to actually remove cellulite. 

















3.)  Cellulite won't scoot off your boot-ay any time soon because it's actually a layer of loose-lying fat stuck between layers of skin.  Creams won't penetrate well enough to effect it, and while massage may temporarily poke it back thru the connective fibers in the layers of skin it's poked thru to create that bumpy cellulite look, it's just gonna eventually ooze back through.  And even highly expensive liposuction won't get rid of it, as liposuction targets body fat deposits and can't skim between skin layers to remove cellulite.



















4.)  You better just learn to love the skin you're in, because even those skinny vegan chicks got cellulite too (although they don't "got milk").  Men are less likely to have cellulite simply because their bodies are built differently and they don't collect fat the same way we women tend to (drat those cheese-burger eating men!).  As your skin ages it will lose elasticity (no duh), but basically, genetics, age, and body type all determine the type of skin (and cellulite) you're gonna carry around.  So do your darnedest, eat well and work those curves out so you're plenty healthy, but don't go buying miracle creams or indulging in ridiculous liposuction.  Simply be beautiful.   In spite of the cellulite.








(Mischa Barton's cellulite-y legs and behind.)

Worry: Savvy Chics Let Go

I woke up the other day in an extremely bad mood.  No, we aren't talking just waking up with indigestion or waking up to realize "oh crumb, it's that time of month again."  I was anxious, discouraged, and mopey with flashes of anger here and there.  It was a bad, very bad mood I woke up to.  

The weird thing about that "mood" was this...  I had nothing to base it on.  I couldn't understand where these feelings of helplessness, worry, and fear came from.  I'm extremely analytical, but nothing made sense about this mood.

All that to say this:  Women, we are emotional creatures.  Would you happen to agree with me?  Emotions come way more easily to me and you (as women) than our male counterparts (or so we would believe...) 

In case you were wondering if you were the only odd duck out there having a shitty day for apparently no reason, please read ahead and be reassured by the following paragraphs.

Emotional differences between men and women are greater in North America than in other cultures, particularly Asian culture.

Women show greater concern about home life and family issues, while men worry about more political issues.

Many studies indicate that society views women as typically emotional b/c of their personality or characteristics, whereas men are simply having a cruddy day.  She's emotional.  He's having a bad day.   "In other words, he's angry because of context: he was cut off by another driver, for instance, or because he was elbowed in an elevator. She's angry because of disposition, personality, temperament—she's emotional. And he's fearful because he's reacting to the situation—he found a rattlesnake in the house, say, or was trapped in a burning building. She's afraid because that's her nature."

In fact, we women are such roller coasters of emotion that we cannot hold high political positions of office!  (read about Hillary Clinton's anger issues here)

Men struggle with just as many worries, anger issues, bouts of anxiety, and cases of insecurity as women do.  One medical male health website lists issues men deal with, reassuring them that it is totally normal to feel this way. I'm sure the way men handle their emotions are much different from the ways we women handle them, however.  The simple fact that men have more testosterone flooding their brain connectors in their communication areas means they're going to be more basic and clean-cut in making emotional decisions, whereas we women have raging rapids of estrogen delivering emotionally-charged energy through our communicating circuits.  Obviously, men will make decisions we might not based on our emotions.

Basically, we women should take a deep breath when we're strung out emotionally.  I personally would suggest the following...

  • jumping on a trampoline
  • walking your dog (or cat)
  • taking a walk on a nature trail
  • snuggling with a furry pet or a loved one
  • hitting the gym
  • journalling
  • playing a musical instrument
  • playing basketball or any other impact sport
  • listening to a book on tape/cd
Savvy chics out there, life sucks sometimes.  People are rotten, unpredictable, and downright selfish sometimes  (and we're ALL people...!).  So take a moment to mentally prepare yourself for some nasty emotional repercussions when life gets down and dirty.

If you're a savvy chic, when you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, you will simply breathe deeply, rack it all up to life and a flux of hormones or bad pizza, and get on with your day with a smile (real or fake doesn't matter) on your face.  (just beware...too many quick smiles may lead others to believe you are insincere)  (lol) 

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Feedback Time :)

Please leave a comment below with a suggestion of what you'd love to read about, whether it's listed below or not.

Ideas:
1.  the unwanted guest on women's bodies (cellulite: what is it, where did it come from, and how to get rid of it)
2. fashion inspiration (where do you get your's?  or who in your life do you admire for their fashion sense?)
3.  real-life blog: what's in your closet (horrendous vs. stupendous) featuring pics of our closets and what terrifying and terrific things are inside (think polka dots, hideous green wool sweaters, or svelte silk halter tops for only $4)
4.  can you tell the difference between designer and generic? (take a look at outfits created by readers (and me) and tell us if you can differentiate between off-the-rack or out of the attic)
5.  what's your favorite fashion accessory?  readers weigh in
6.  life-planning blog:  what is one life skill you wish you had (check-book balancing, budgeting, planning, changing a flat, cleaning a house, navigating traffic, finding the love of your life--you fill in the blank)
--these are a few of my favorite things:  what cheers you up?  (besides chocolate)
7.  Uh-Oh! blog post:  life-changing emergencies that happen everyday-- what they are and how to handle them
8.  the dirt on drycleaning--is it totally overrated???  get the low-down on the most cost-efficient ways to clean your stuff and avoid getting your pockets emptied at the cleaner's
9.  prep for winter:  are you, your wardrobe, your home and car ready for those blustery temps?
10.  skin 101:  what are every day tips you can incorporate into your routine to give you luscious skin?
11.  Yuck!  why do they make me feel so gross?!  emotional trips that "toxic people" can send you on:  what are they and how to do navigate them?
12.  Bare and Beautiful:  boost your confidence with these amazing facts about how your man thinks about your nudey-doody body
13.  Moolah:  where does it go?!  trippy ways to trick yourself into saving money
14.  Save your own A$$:  true tales of helplessness b/c of failure to plan ahead
15.  Family:  can't live without them while you're living with them-- ways to sweeten the deal with your siblings and parents
16.  The Female Brain:  think no one understands you?  there's a reason why!  female brains are tricky!  (an interesting buncha facts from a renowned brain scientist and author who wrote the book "The Female Brain")  (gives lots of insight into how we work mentally)
17.  Don't Kid Me:  how not to get knocked up.  be a savvy girl and find out the zillions of ways things can go wrong, then avoid them so you can live the life you need to, baby-free
18.  Powder Power:  a gazillion ways to use the miracle powder you keep in your purse.  (no, not THAT powder...we're talking baby powder here!)
19.  Drink Yourself Skinny:  the craziest way to lose weight is also one of the simplest
20.  What's Lurking...?  the dirtiest places in your life/household/workplace and how to avoid their icky effects

...and much more...

Regrets? Or just constructive criticism from yourself?

Do you view regrets positively or negatively?

I always wondered if those care-free crazy people shouting "Live life with no regrets!!"  at the top of their lungs as they go cliff jumping into unknown waters and/or stay up all night boozing, wake up in the morning with no regrets. 

But joking aside...!  (see FAIL Blog)

Who doesn't regret a least one or two poorly-timed words, thoughtless action, or miscalculated expenditure in their life?

Looking back, you might think, "Wow I wish I hadn't _______." 

Personally, I believe regrets are a way of maturing. 

Your conscience is telling you, "Hey!  You're growing!" as you realize, now that you're a little older and/or wiser, you might have done ______ differently. 

So when you have just...
  • overindulged (who can resist Ben & Jerry's?!)
  • snapped at your boyfriend/coworker/sister/sibling/parent/random stranger on the sidewalk/dog/etc
  • bought that _______ you just couldn't resist
...stop and pat yourself on the back for realizing you possible mistake...and make a big mental note to avoid the same slip-up next time.

You can't change the past, only the future.  Don't "drive through life" looking through the rear-view mirror--how safe would that be?!  Simply acknowledge the mistake, shrug your shoulders, forgive yourself (or ask others for forgiveness), and move on.

After all, you're only human. 

So...my basic consensus is this:  regrets can be bad if they're dwelt upon. 
I am blogging through my phone! Wow technology is amazing. :)

Photo Blog! Burlington, Vermont

winter boardwalk along lake champlain

bubbly ice at the waterfront's edge looking up at Burlington

sailboats on lake champlain

Church Street, downtown Burlington

Burlington is full of beautiful architecture, old mixed with new

Burlington is full of artists and their work

a hot, hazy day on lake champlain

walking on the bike path near the lake front

looking thru the rail yards towards burlington's high rises

delicious crepes and eggs from The Skinny Pancake

The Skinny Pancake

Burlington's brick buildings mingle with beautiful trees

it couldn't be a more beautiful evening on the waterfront

pedestrians, bikers, and joggers all enjoy the bike path that runs along the waterfront for miles

sunset over lake champlain

winter 2009

Burlington is full of beautiful historic buildings and houses

winter driving